It Clicked!

Still moving in the right direction. Had a good loss last week. I have to say that the biggest change I see in myself now is that I BELIEVE...no...I KNOW that I am going to get to goal this time, for the first time in my life and unlike my many attempts in the past to get the weight off, I KNOW that I am going to do it this time.

What I can't figure out is what's different. What changed. That I haven't been able to pinpoint. Something clicked this time. I just know that after several losses of very close family members, I went back to Weight Watchers with a determination I haven't had before, and it became very clear to me when I went back that I was going to do it this time.

What else changed? EVERYTHING. I learned that exercise HAS to be a part of my life and that the key for me was challenge and to have fun with it. That's where the running comes in, and that's where the roller skating comes in. I also try to challenge myself when doing the elliptical workouts. It doesn't have to be as drastic or even the elliptical.

At first, it was trying to get some type of exericise in. Walking was a good fit for me when I first joined. Sometimes it was learning that I could get exericse in on those busy days simply by exercising during commercials while watching tv at night or using a body ball (not so gracefully).

It was also about finding other things to fill my life other than food. That's my new way of thinking. Food should fill my belly, not necessarily my life, right? In other words, my life should not revolve around food and I don't have to make a big extravagant meal every night. Sometimes maybe sandwich and a salad is fine and made with the right ingredients, can still be fabulous. I'm not saying that I don't love food or that cooking is no longer a love of mine, but now I love to try to create healthier versions of my favorites and enjoy the REALLY good stuff (pasta) occasionally instead of all the time.

I started spending more time with family and especially the kids, doing things that are fun, whether it's chasing the kids around the yard, taking them for walks, going roller skating, dancing at birthday parties, just having fun. I found that going for long walks in the park was an easy way to get exercise in and enjoy my surroundings and destress.

Little by little, the weight has continued to go and my days are all about getting my work done and finding time to MOVE, finding time to enjoy the garden, finding time to enjoy life.

I'm only sorry that I didn't figure this all out years ago while I was younger. Dad tried to tell me but it NEVER CLICKED. It frustrates me that I went through my childhood, teenage years, dating years, married life, up until now dealing with the weight issues, the things I couldn't or wouldn't do because of the weight, being so self conscious all the time. I wish I had known what THIS feels like. You know, I can't change the past, BUT I AM CHANGING THE FUTURE!